What would it be like seeing my EX again? The thought of it was unnerving. I mean, how was I supposed to act? Was I supposed to greet him with a hug? It would be kinda weird not to. We always kissed and hugged “hello” and “goodbye”. But he cheated on me. And we’re getting divorced! So maybe I should just give him a formal “hello” with a smile? Wait, why would I smile? I’m supposed to hate him, right? But I just loved him about 2 months ago.
Just as I was feeling overwhelmed with the task of excavating through 8 years of emotional rubble to rescue the embattled Keex, I got a call from my EX. He needed a favor. The nerve! But he was in a bind. The gig that was supposed to (appropriately) deposit him in Vegas... the modern-day Sodom & Gomorrah... the city that celebrates sin and excess...the land of pleasure-seeking addicts; was actually sending him to Europe for an indefinite amount of time.
I couldn’t mimic my EX’s cheerful tone and he instantly inferred my “let’s just cut-to-the-chase” kinda mood. Eschewing any phoniness I continued in my distant, matter-of-fact voice. “So, I’m calling because I just heard that you cheated on me on New Year’s Eve. Is that true?” SILENCE. “Well, I guess I’ll take your silence as my answer.” More uncomfortable silence. Uncomfortable for him. In that moment, I oddly felt in control. I felt like I had built up the emotional armor to protect myself from anything else the Universe decided to hurl in my direction.
As my gut churned, I could see the tears welling up in her eyes and I knew I was destined for a doosey. My mind was spinning with worst case scenarios about what could be going on in her life, hoping that reality would soften the blow of my imagination. My thoughts were interrupted with my BFF saying, “It’s really hard for me to tell you this because I love you so much...” Wait, this wasn’t about her? It’s about ME? I can’t handle any more bad news!
